I'm very excited to have found this list! Ever since I began searching spiritual-related topics online, I have felt more and more that I am not alone in this world, but now more than ever I'm beginning to feel it strongly! Although there have been times that I've felt very alone, I've known somehow that we're never alone. Even still, I was always the odd-one-out through-out my childhood, and some of my thoughts and mannerisms seemed very odd, even to myself at times! ;) I had more than once believed myself to be crazy, but accepted it with a laugh and a shrug.
I hope this doesn't get too long, but I'm excited to find others who I believe I can share with freely! Forgive me ahead of time if this is long-winded! :)
Ever since I can remember I've been interested in the unknown. My elementary school library had a lovely section of "Popular Science" books (at least, I think that's what series they were) which amazingly had a series of books which I devoured with great interest: ESP, OBEs, Ghosts & Hauntings, UFOs, Unexplained Mysteries (which included the Bermuda Triangle, Crop Circles, the Great Pyramid, among others). Amazing! Right there in an elementary school library! I adored those books. But often in reading them they left me with a sadness as well. Especially with the books on extrasensory perception and out of body experiences. I longed to have these experiences myself, and wondered why only "special" people could be born with the ability!
My parents chose not to raise me in any formal religion. Neither of them were church-goers, so I never went to church. Early in elementary school (either in grade 2 or 3) I remember sitting outside of my classroom with a bunch of other girls from the class, working on a project together. We were chitchatting, and somehow the topic came to bible stories. (A bit of background: my town is situated in the middle of a bible-belt). The conversation went to Noah's Ark, and I offered the suggestion, "What if Noah's Ark never happened?".... oh you should have seen the looks on those poor girl's faces! They were shocked. How dare I suggest such a thing! From that day on I was branded "weird", and was pretty much an outcast. I was always a very shy and reserved kid, and this made it even worse.
I used to make believe that I was from another world. Playing alone with my dog, I would talk to her in my own language and pretend we were on missions from our true home.
In school I was kind of average. I had great difficulty with math, but was very good in English and anything computer or art-related. Due to my shyness, I never tried to rebel against my parents or my teachers. I got along well with some teachers... for the most part I was well-liked amongst them, and I liked that. I gave up on homework pretty quick. Never studied for tests until the morning of the test. But somehow I was able to squeak by. My peers all thought I was some geeky A-student, for some reason. I got A's in art/computer classes, nothing else. I didn't mind school, but I didn't enjoy it either. I found quickly that I don't learn much using their methods. I learn better teaching myself.
I never felt a need to be a part of an organized religion. The concept of "God" as a being in a kingdom called "Heaven" who sits around on a throne all day with his good servants sitting around him never sat well with me. I couldn't see it, it didn't feel right. I don't know what age I was, between the ages of 11-13, I began to discuss with my mom the concept of One. To be honest, I don't remember where the idea came from. I remember drawing a picture in art once of an old dandelion, with it's fluffy seeds being blown off of it. I told my mom it was symbolic of the One. From One beginning, all those little seeds were born and sent off to live their own lives elsewhere. The difference, I explained, was that with us... we return.
It was also during this time that I was struck with a couple ideas. One was a story about a world like ours and how the people of that world destroyed their planet, just like we seem to be doing through pollution and other destruction, only they were further along than we are and actually destroyed their world. The story itself is a bit long, and I'd be glad to share it some other time. I've been told by some that I've shared it with that it sounds familiar to other things they've seen/read. The other idea I had was that I am to write a book (or series of books) that would teach people about Oneness, the Light, etc. The general idea was a fictional novel based on possible truths which would "strike a bell" with some, to help awaken them.
Although I left my make believe game of being an alien behind as I grew older, I never lost the feelings. Even as a teenager... even now... I would secretly hold on to the belief that I was an reincarnated alien. As time went on, I began to believe that I have had past lives on Earth, but perhaps not as many as some, or perhaps I haven't been here in a very long time. (Also since childhood I've had a great interest in Ancient Egypt, and suspect I may have been around back then)
I received the "Sleeping ETs Quiz", and all the points make sense to me. This one in particular I was surprised to see...
-- * You have a hard time recognizing evil and trickery: some people call you naive (and they're right!). When you do perceive genuine negativity in your midst, you recoil in horror and may feel shocked that "some people really do things like that." In a subtle way, you actually feel confused. Perhaps you vaguely sense having known a world free of such disharmony. --
I've often been called naive, and have caught myself at it as well. I really do feel surprise sometimes at the things I encounter, and I often trust when I perhaps shouldn't. I often feel like an outsider looking in. Although I am definitely a part of this Earth right now, I still feel like an outsider. Even after all these years, I still feel confusion sometimes when faced with some situations.
I'm drawn to try to help people. If someone's sad or angry, I listen to their problems and try to offer suggestions, but sometimes I'm at a real loss... unsure what to say, because for me it's easier to let go of some things that they find great difficulty with.
My biggest thing right now, since I'm 22 years old, is that I cannot accept what most people see as "normal" lives. On the Metagifted.org website it's listed as the "American Dream" (9-5 career, marriage, 2.5 children, house with white picket fence, etc.) Well, I'm from Canada but the situation is similar. I cannot imagine life like that! I balk at it as much as possible, but it keeps getting thrown in my face - that I should have a career, priorities. It's confusing, and I'm feeling very lost right now in a lot of ways.
I'm so happy to have this chance to connect with other, like-minded people! I can't wait to meet others on this list... and I hope to maybe find some like-minded people in my region! (British Columbia, Canada).
In Love & Light,
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