Hi everyone, my name is Dina (38) and I live in California. I came across this website a few weeks ago and couldn't believe what I was reading.
I can't say I thought I was different from everyone else I just couldn't understand why people didn't see things the same way I did. I had to fight from a very young age and learned to split from my innerself when things became to overwhelming to handle. I had my first suicide attempt at age 8. I became distraught over an arguement with my mother and went to the medicine cabnet and took several different pills, layed on my bed and waited to die. I remember lying there, on my bed, thinking about my mothers reaction when she found me lying there--dead. I remember indept fantasizing going on about the whole senario, how sorry she would be, how she was going to miss me, blaming herself for treating me so dastardly, I guess I took vitamins because nothing happened and after awhile I got bored and went out to play.
I really was a very well mannered child and would only throw a tamtrum if extreme circumstances merited one. On the other hand, I was being sexually abused. There were several different perpetrators and I learned the don't tell "secret". I have often wondered how I survived such an awful childhood and remained sane. I had my first drink at the age twelve and quickly learned it took my emotions far from me and life was somehow tolerable. I was a full fledged drinker and drug user by the time I was twenty years old.
I started having sex at an early age (gee i wonder why?) I had an abortion at the age of 14, a miscarriage at 15, and my first born at sixteen. I got married just before she was born and by the age of 22 had my two sons.
My youngest son is a miracle because by then I was injecting drugs and made a conscious choice to continue doing them even though I was pregnant. My sons are 10 months apart and I did not want to be pregnant with my youngest. I tried to abort the child but that did not happen. The Creator works in mysterious ways because he was born a normal and healthy child. I have always said "Jacob being born normal was an act of Grace because it was nothing I did and I believe the Creator has special plans for him" I believe he may be an indigo child as well. He seems to fit a lot of the characteristics and it would explain why he was not adversely affected by my drug use.
A couple of years after he was born I entered a rehab and began learning about me, myself and life. I have learned many different things and found a faith that deserved much attention. I have always wondered about the why's and truths of life and knew deep down there was much more to this life and earth than what "meets the eye". Thus began my search for the truth. I have sunk to great depts of depression, I have be a self mutelator, I have tried several times to kill the pain that has invaded my spirit for many, many years. Thank-God, I have never been successful!
I have escaped thru books and work but I keep coming back to the same question, "what is it I am supposed to be doing to help my fellow man?" Slowly, the picture is emerging. Slowly, I am gaining understanding and wisdom . Slowly, the Universe delivers it's answer to me. I am glad to know I am not alone. I am scared and elated at the same time. I still have my day to day problems. I still go to work each day and drudge through the boredom of it all.
There are many parts I left out of my bio and I didn't want it to be too long. All I know is what I have learned up to this point about the earth, the Universe, Tao, the Creator, the Spirits, the Underworld, are relevent in my studies for the helping of Indigo children. I realize I am a teacher of sorts and am learning to recognize these special children and adults. I am gathering up the courage to let the information out about Indigos and our purpose here.
In the Spirt of Light and Love
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